Stoicism is a philosophical school that originated in ancient Greece and held great influence in ancient Rome. It teaches that we can achieve inner peace and resilience through reason (rationality).
But how?
- By focusing on what we can control and not concerning ourselves with external matters—things we therefore cannot control!
I believe this is the key to reframing our lives after an unexpected, devastating event that forever changes our thoughts and actions.
I know that the loss of a loved one—especially a child—is often accompanied by feelings of guilt and regret over what we think we could have done to prevent it. This is a painful illusion that robs us of peace! We have no control over what has already happened; if we truly did, we would have prevented it.
This phenomenon occurs in various everyday situations, and even in the financial markets! Yet, after something bad happens, we are left with the impression that we could have controlled the outcome and prevented it! This is not true, but it certainly disrupts our peace of mind!
It is of no use to dwell on it! Let us be like the Stoic Seneca: external events beyond our control should not affect us. Let us cultivate wisdom through reason, practice moderation and self-control in our actions and thoughts, live in harmony with nature and with kindness toward others, and—above all—focus on the present!
By doing so, achieving peace becomes easier. And for us, peace is the sibling of happiness. To have peace means not rebelling against reality, but rather being grateful for our lives and for the life we had the joy of sharing.
So, when someone asks, "How are you?" we can answer: "I am at peace!"
Long live Seneca!
Reference: Seneca, "On the Shortness of Life"