A year has passed. Before that I always thought: Last year, on this day, you
were with me ... Almost daily and thought those things and it tormented me. It's
like I imagined that I could master time and it would be still possible to make
time come back and prevent from losing you.
I live today as someone who took a beating and surrendered. I cherish the promises of God. I took leave of you and many things. Things that I liked to hang out with you.
Today I'm a Nike kind person: "Just do it". I try to live in the present. I feel myself half from the earth and the other half from the sky and this way I feel closer to God and assume you're okay. I read the Bible often and in so doing, I feel even closer to God which strengthen my faith and keep me in the knowledge that you are with God in peace and happiness. I also believe that when you miss me you gather together with Our Lady and thus reassure me and I feel closer to you.
It is difficult to live with the void that will never be filled. But you
need to learn and accept. The other day I was coming home at night and noticed everything
was dark, so I opened the door, turned on the light and did what I always did
when you were here, I shouted the name of my three children: Jessica, Breno, Iel.
When I just finished to pronounce Iel’s name a butterfly came out of the kitchen
window (I live on the 6th floor) touched the left side of my face and flew back
out the window. Got it as a kiss from Iel, although I know that skeptics think
that it was a coincidence.
From that day I have decided to give peace a chance as John Lennon said.
Got it with that kiss it was you asked me to do!
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